Happy Birthday Melia!

Dear Melia,

Today you turn one-year-old. ONE!  I can't believe this day has finally come.  It's hard to believe that 365 days ago,  you were hanging out in my belly, one day past your due date.  I guess you will just always be fashionably late.  I remember feeling the contractions at 1:30 in the morning and not being able to go back to sleep.  Soon I woke your dad up, and we went downstairs to watch Happy Gilmore as we timed the contractions which were coming every 30 minutes.  Needless to say, we didn't get much rest that night.  When we preparing the birth plan, I was going to try to give birth without any medication.  By 10 that morning, the contractions were coming every 20 minutes and the pain was more than I anticipated.  I was certain I would ask for an epidural the moment we arrived at the hospital.  We finally got to the hospital at 2 in the afternoon and were admitted by 2:45 pm.  

By 4:30 pm I finally was administered the epidural (ah, relief!), and I was actually enjoying labor.  I figured I could do this for several more hours, but you had other plans.  You wanted out immediately.  Unfortunately, my epidural was too strong and I could no longer feel the contractions.  The nurses told me that I would need to be able to feel them in order to push.  By 6 pm I was completely dilated and should be pushing, but still could not feel anything.  We decided to wait until I could start feeling the contractions again.  At around 7 pm, you were not happy.  Your heart rate started to fall and your oxygen levels dropped dramatically.  You needed to get out soon.  The on-call doctor came immediately to our room and told me that we would either need to have an emergency c-section or she would need to use forceps to remove you.  The other nurses tried to move me in a position that suited you better.  Finally, they had me in plank position and you seemed to respond better.  Your heart rate went up and soon was back to normal.  Apparently, your umbilical cord was getting crushed and you weren't getting enough oxygen, but plank pose and an oxygen mask seemed to help.

By 8 pm, I still didn't feel any contractions.  My nurse said that we needed to start pushing and by watching the monitor, she would guide me on when to do so.  We pushed for what felt like eternity but really was for 2 1/2 hours.  At 10:34 pm you came into this world.

When I first saw your little face, I cried.  I couldn't believe this tiny little creature was finally here.  You looked up at me with big swollen eyes, your arms and legs flailing about.  You were so tiny yet so very strong.  They placed you on my stomach and I remember us just staring at each other.  For nine months, we shared so much.  I remember hearing your hiccups and feeling you wiggle.  You enjoyed all my cheeseburgers and milkshakes.  Now you were outside and able to experience the world on your own.

When we found out we were pregnant, I tried to prepare myself for what to expect.  What prenatal pills should I take, what I should refrain from eating, what exercise I should be getting, and how to plan for the labor and birth.  I didn't really prepare for how to take care of a baby.  I hadn't changed a diaper in over 20 years, I didn't know how to burp a baby, I didn't know how to comfort one, I didn't know what to do.  But your dad and I soon learned.  We found that you loved being swaddled and wanted to eat pretty much every 2-3 hours.  For the most part, you are pretty mellow, but certainly are opinionated and not afraid to voice your wants.

As this year has passed, I have grown to love you more and more.  With time, we were able to learn each others' habits and rituals.  You don't always make it easy for me, but you certainly know how to keep life interesting.  I look forward to watching you grow and change every day.  Watching you enjoy and experience something new allows me to relive those experiences again.  You have brought a meaning to my life in a way I can't really describe.  And I thank you for that.

Looking forward to celebrating many more birthdays with you.

Love always, 

Your mom